


trying hard not to fall

by amclove



Category: RPF - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF, Youtube RPF
Genre: AU, Coming Out, F/M, Fluff, Friendship, M/M, Sort Of, VAGUELY based on real life lol, exposing my secret cameraman, is the title a lyric from fools?? of course it is dsjksflhdskj, like FLUFF yall lol, theyre just :(( in love! ugh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-04-05 07:43:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19044163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amclove/pseuds/amclove
Summary: what can i say? twenty-biteen truly is the year to thrive. (i actually like this a lot but i suck at summaries so thank you lol)





	trying hard not to fall

    Shane hadn’t been kidding when he said that, between Garrett and Morgan, they were going to have two of the former on their hands. Garrett always thought that that was because he and Morgan joke constantly about being addicted to sweets and laugh like donkeys at the slightest possible happenings. Now Garrett unfortunately is coming to realise that yet another thing he and the younger girl have in common is falling for the wrong boys.

    Their luck is tragically reversed, because whereas Morgan’s past two relationships (read: only two) have ended with the guys being gay, Garrett rarely dates and when he does in fact like a man, said man is usually straight. (He wishes he had known Morgan then, to maybe have passed them along to her. He has pretty decent taste—aside from their being wholly uninterested in his penis, of course.)

    Arguably, Garrett is a mess. He has a button-down with lobsters on it buried in a drawer somewhere, gifted to him by Shane and then left in the lurch by the man himself; he tends to hunch when he stands as to avoid attention, but his wild laugh seems to attract more eyes than if he’d been not only standing straight but dressed as Pennywise; and worst of all, he has so much love to give that it basically oozes from every orifice, so obviously that whenever he does somehow manage to score a date, his nervous excitement to finally, _finally_ possibly have a companion scares the guy off irrevocably.

    That trend ends briefly with Andrew Siwicki in middle school. Not the _I only like straight boys_ trend (which is only just about to begin for the 13 year old), but the one where everyone finds Garrett’s big heart insincere and generally annoying.

    Andrew, decidedly, doesn’t.

    He’s quiet around most everybody else, but Garrett somehow rouses a laugh from the other boy during a history lesson and can’t quite believe his ears. It isn’t a laugh _at_ Garrett, but _with_ him, and every fibre of his being wants to chase that reaction. He doesn’t care if it takes forever, he thinks stupidly: he’ll make that kid laugh like that again, so help him Uma.

    So the awkwardly tall, Memphis middle-schooler asks Andrew (known member of the film club) to help him record a video for the final in English. The assignment is to record a day in the life of a character from _East of Eden_ and, surprise surprise, Garrett is the star of the camera. From behind the lens, Andrew laughs that shocking hyena laugh that matches Garrett’s insane giggles, and Garrett comes to see after only a short time filming that he has a best friend. For the first time in his entire life, someone takes as much pleasure in hanging around him as he does them, and it feels _awesome_.

    The other aforementioned trend, falling for straight boys, coincidentally begins with Andrew Siwicki too. Garrett adores every last thing about him, to the point that it’s almost embarrassing, but never in a million years will he tell Andrew. Their friendship keeps him breathing and the absolute last thing he would do, the _last thing_ , would be to lose that.

    And it isn’t so hard. Garrett, now a fucking senior at uni and surviving day by day, still has Andrew, and it doesn’t ache as much. He barely notices his old crush, really; it only surfaces when Andrew smiles in that particular way, where his eyes crinkle at the corners, or he throws back his head in a laugh at whatever bullshit Garrett had said and then falls forward, covering his face with shaking shoulders. Moments like those simultaneously remind Garrett of why he loves Andrew so much as his closest friend, and why wanting more is so unbelievably painful.

    But he’s okay, because they keep in touch via Skype and the (incredibly) occasional cross-country weekend visit between where Garrett is in Arizona and Andrew is in Illinois. It’s all okay, _more_ than okay, because Andrew is the one person who’s always appreciated Garrett for all he is and never wanted him to change. He doesn’t need him to be gay or bi or anything other than just Andrew ‘Cameraman’ Siwicki.

    It sort of sucks, though, when he’s studying late at night and his tired eyes slip to the wall behind his desk to see that years-old photo of him and Andrew at Prom. Even having gone as friends, Andrew had laughed and insisted that they pose like a cheesy couple in the movies. He’s grinning like he’s the cat who ate the canary, always so mysterious and handsome and dorky, and Garrett looks—well, like he wants to be sick (so, the usual), but he’s beaming too and squeezing Andrew so tightly from behind that he’s still to this day surprised Andrew didn’t jump away from the embrace in disgust.

    So yeah, it sucks when he looks at that preserved memory and the time difference is just enough that he doesn’t want to risk waking his best friend from a nice sleep.

    He instead just misses him so severely that it’s like he’s Cerberus waiting for his chopped head to grow back, except his chopped head is the feeling of Andrew in that tux pressed to his chest and holding his shaking hands steady against his abdomen.

* * *

    Andrew didn’t like making a lot of noise as a kid. He kept to himself, mostly, always had, and liked it that way. Drawing attention made him feel obnoxious and he preferred to stay hidden in his hoodies and baseball hats. In that way, the life of a videographer had always seemed appealing. To not necessarily be a part of the action, but to record it and maybe rework it for the world to be amazed by. He wants to be Spielberg à la _Jurassic Park_ , but that’s difficult to accomplish as a quiet ginger kid in Tennessee.

    His one good friend had moved at the end of the last semester and so Andrew has pretty much nothing going for him aside from being a member of the film club. (Which a lot of students joined in the hopes that the group watches movies and eats popcorn all the time. It’s always tragic when they find out that it isn’t, in fact, that kind of club after all.) He doesn’t mind being sort of unknown; he isn’t _dis_ liked, he’s more just _there_ , but he’s so sure that he’ll be in California by his twenty-fifth birthday that even if he _had_ been disliked, it would’ve all washed right over him. Bigger fish to fry and all that.

    Point being, he hasn’t put up a sign in search of a new best friend. If anything, he’s kept quieter than ever, head down and work done well. That’s why it takes Andrew by such surprise the one afternoon in an American history class when a boy up front causes a stupid laugh to erupt from his throat and into the silent air of the classroom. Sure, another kid had laughed under his breath, but Andrew had pretty much transformed into one of Scar’s hench-hyenas. It was atrocious, and a sound he only makes in his own home for that exact reason. And somehow, the kid up front with strange glasses and a huge smile had yanked Andrew’s laugh out of his bedroom and into that classroom.

    So when Garrett approaches him in an oversized Hawaiian, floral-print button-down (probably designed for vacationing dads exclusively) and a hand ready to shake, Andrew is speechless. Well, apart from agreeing to help him film a video for an English class. Garrett’s idea makes Andrew laugh uncontrollably no matter how many takes they shoot for it, and it really takes a lot of willpower to keep it down and get usable footage. It’s hilarious and off the wall and so weird, and that’s _Garrett_. Andrew loves it, he loves Garrett, and he’s only known him for a week.

    It isn’t hard for them to fall into a routine, becoming each other’s closest friend almost instantaneously, Andrew with his camera ready to record Garrett’s every word, and Garrett with his offbeat wit and way of seeing the world that Andrew can’t get enough of.

   And part of Garrett’s ‘way of seeing the world’ comes quite obviously from being gay. Garrett said that he normally kept it to himself, but something about Andrew’s trustworthy brown eyes later and then it was out in the open. Andrew doesn’t care in the way Garrett would have thought, and for the briefest second he wants to say, _What’s it feel like? I mean, how do you know?_ but he doesn’t want to seem ignorant and make Garrett feel weird, so he keeps the questions in his head.

     _Can you tell if another guy is maybe gay too?_

* * *

    He’s happy for him. Like, genuinely. Andrew is the best person Garrett knows and for him to have found someone as cool and sweet as Sadie, Garrett isn’t upset. Well, he’s not thrilled but he’d known years ago that the person to make Andrew happy (in _that_ way) was just never going to be Garrett. So Andrew’s being with Sadie is bittersweet. (Read: _I’m happy you’re happy, I really am, but I also sort of wish that I could have found a man first to avoid feeling like garbage as you unconsciously prance your new girl around me, your perpetually single third-wheel._ )

    They met in line at Starbucks, like some sort of rom-com, because they’d both wanted the same muffin and isn’t that just so cute? The jealous, bitchy part of Garrett wants to point out that he and Andrew not only like the same kind of muffin but have baked them together. They’ve done everything two people can do (aside from _that_ stuff), are closer than some married couples are, but isn’t it such a fun coincidence that Sadie and Andrew both have brown eyes? It’s the most common eye-color in the world, but yeah, y’all may as well elope! No, I _won’t_ be the witness.

    Garrett hates himself for being that way. Andrew is kind, and looks at Garrett like he’s someone important; and his smile is literally the contented feeling Garrett gets when he sees earthworms after rain; and he deserves this, Goddammit! So Garrett shoves those mean thoughts all the way deep, deep into his psyche and refuses to entertain them as two months of Sandrew becomes five and Garrett has to admit that maybe this is going somewhere.

    He surprises even himself with how cool and collected he is. He gives Andrew advice when he asks for it, withholds opinions that aren’t asked for, and strives to be the best friend that his best friend needs.

    He’s further surprised at his self-control when Andrew texts him one summer night that he and Sadie are done. No embellishments. It’s been over half a year, and then just like that, it’s over, and Garrett has to ask _Are you okay? What can I do?_ He’s left without a response, and it takes all of Garrett not to get onto a plane and go to him. Andrew’s fine without him by now, he doesn’t need Garrett butting in right after a breakup. He’s better off minding his own.

* * *

    Sadie is beautiful. There’s a real attraction not only to her body but to her mind, her personality, her disinterest in so much of the usual stuff that girls are obsessed with. It’s like having another best friend—who he can sleep (and actually _sleep_ ) with.

    He’s screwed, he quickly realises, when dating Sadie doesn’t (as he’d hoped) obliterate his lingering feelings toward Garrett. She’s gorgeous and funny, fucking perfect on all accounts, but she’s also clingy in a way that he’s sure he wouldn’t mind (doesn’t mind) from… someone else. Her jokes have started to fall flat as he comes to see that they haven’t got as much in common as he’d thought, and initially that had been fine, because who wants to be a clone of their S.O.? But their differences gnaw at Andrew and he finds himself going to Garrett for advice, even a sign that he should selfishly end it with Sadie and…

    But Garrett is nothing but supportive, and Andrew shouldn’t be surprised. Garrett has always, _always_ been the best friend a guy could ask for, and no matter what hesitant glances and familiar Cheshire grins might mean in another context, theirs is one of friendship and nothing else. So he keeps at it with Sadie in the hopes that their original spark will return, and when it’s been almost seven months, Andrew knows that he can’t go on wasting her time, or his own.

     _What can I do?_

     _You can get on a plane and come to Illinois and make this shitty night better_ , Andrew wants to reply. _We can watch_ _cheesy as hell horror movies_ _and you can make dumb jokes that border on plain not funny because you know those are the kind that make me laugh the hardest, and you know that because you know me better than anyone else and you’re the one I need here by my side, the one I’ve always needed and I’m_

He doesn’t answer and feels like garbage the entire night, for not texting back and for hurting Sadie, and for the selfish sense of relief he feels knowing that they’re over.

* * *

    L.A. is everything Garrett expected but also horrible, and he loves every second of it. He can be as gay as he wants (pretty much) and runs far less of a death risk than if he were back in Memphis. He can’t really believe that after years residing a state over at uni, he’s finally living his West Coast dream.

    His apartment is pretty tragic but the rent is cheap and he gets to be as messy as ever since the other guy’s hardly there. He’s sure he should be cleaner to avoid becoming a literal hoarder but that’s a problem for future-Garrett to handle.

    A date gone awry ends with a new good friend, a soulmate, who helped to break the trend of straight men if nothing else, and their time together reminds Garrett that he’s plenty likeable and doesn’t need to be so scared of dying alone. Shane also is the first person that Garrett’s ever met who understands his issues with his body and doesn’t just say that boys don’t go through things like that. (Because they _do_ , and it fucking _sucks_. Just ask him and Shane.) It’s all very refreshing, to be honest.

    It takes a turn when Andrew makes his dreams a reality as well and gets hired in videography and editing in the same city as Garrett. He’s thrilled for them to be living close to one another once again, but that close proximity is a reminder too of his hideous crush that has burrowed so deeply into Garrett’s mind that it’s become a permanent part of his being.

     _My name’s Garrett Watts; I’m 26; I love random, weirdly tiny objects; and I’ve had the same crush since I was 13_. _Hi, how are ya?_

    Very boyfriend-material indeed.

    He hates to admit that he’s glad when he has to deny Andrew a room in his moldy, tragic apartment. No way would their landlord allow a third party. And he loves Andrew, but to be so near to him all the time would most likely end with Garrett embarrassing himself beyond belief (more so than normal) and he simply can’t have that.

    So two years go by with their friendship doing just fine, though with Andrew’s work they do spend less time together than they’d grown used to over their teenage years and then lost during uni. Which is good, honestly, getting space between them for Garrett to keep moving forward, but he can’t resist perking up when Shane mentions that his inspiration-well of ideas for videos is beginning to dry up.

* * *

    Andrew is flattered, really. Garrett had said that he couldn’t think of anyone better to re-inspire Shane and his channel than Andrew, and what was he supposed to say to that? A hard no? He agrees to meet Shane and the chemistry is undeniable. The self-deprecating YouTuber and Garrett play off one another too, and Ryland is just so simultaneously energized and relaxed. It makes something in Andrew’s head sort of click, that maybe these two could be something more than just co-workers but actual friends. He would have three friends in L.A. instead of just the one—and all of them gay.

    Andrew flushes (and tries to disguise it) when he finds out about Shane’s bisexuality. As someone contemplating being bi for years, always too nervous to confirm or deny it even to himself, hearing Shane’s difficulties with his own sexual journey kind of makes Andrew want to stand up and say that he too is bisexual and can no longer be considered the token straight friend, because he _isn’t_ and never has been.

    But he doesn’t stand up and he doesn’t admit what he’s feeling, because he’s just the cameraman, same as since he was a kid. Sure, they’re becoming the friends he’d lowkey been hoping for, but he isn’t about to make it about him. Shane is just reinventing the channel and needed his input and Ryland’s just put up a video of his own for the first time ever at Shane’s behest and he just can’t let himself take even a moment away from them. It’s stupid, and he knows that, but he just can’t.

    So they go on haunted trips, they film dumpster-diving videos, they laugh and eat takeout and laugh some more, and all the while Andrew doesn’t admit that he’s bi and falling more in love by the day with his oldest friend, the same he’d been falling for since middle school.

* * *

    It’s weird when Andrew is called by his name for the first time on camera. Garrett can’t help but be in awe that after what felt like so long, Andrew is actually going to be a part of the on-camera experience. He can’t even help it when “Aw, my God, look at him,” slips out, because Andrew’s grey sweater is so well-fitting and it makes him look both soft and sexy at the same time and even after all this time Garrett doesn’t know how he manages that. And his freshly trimmed beard is to die for, and everything is just going _very_ well. Fuck.

    What he _doesn’t_ love is that the first real ‘on-camera experience’ for Andrew is a blind date. With an incredibly gorgeous woman. Upon arrival at the house that night he says Garrett looks good, no, _great_ in his new pants, and looks away with the slightest blush under his freckles, and Garrett wants to call the whole thing off. He wants to drag Andrew from Shane and Ryland’s and back to his place where they can watch _A New Hope_ and possibly do other things while Luke shoots down the Death Star but instead, Garrett has to deal with the consequences of half-encouraging Shane to set up Andrew and a beautiful, flexible YouTuber named Megan. Their babies will be so hot. Ew.

* * *

    In all honesty, Andrew does think she’s cool. Pretty as anything and a personality to match, but most of the flattery comes from Andrew trying to play dumb when Garrett, innocent and sweet, asks about any romantic prospects on the horizon for his good friend Andrew. He never knows what to say and now, in the car with the guys, he can only think to list three uncorrelated women because saying Chris Evans would be a dead giveaway of his not-straightness. (Not to mention the fact that Evans and Garrett sporting the same type of facial hair is large in part why the actor holds such an allure for the videographer.) So no, he can’t say _that_ , and now here he is—thirty minutes after complimenting Garrett’s ‘new pants’ like a shy, lovestruck idiot—waiting for a blind date that he doesn’t actually want coming.

    All those things he evidently loves about Megan, all those things he’s bored his friend to death with the details over—Andrew was always talking about Garrett, oblivious, well-meaning Garrett—even when he scoured Megan’s socials in a half-hearted attempted to develop real feelings for her, for anyone other than his best friend. Now look what’s he gotten himself into.

* * *

    And Shane’s nonstop innuendos don’t help. If Garrett weren’t so even-tempered, he would smack Shane upside the head for being so blatant. He’s never even mentioned his old flame for Andrew, and yet due to Garrett’s total lack of social awareness, the time spent between them all had given Shane the (unfortunate and correct) notion that Garrett had feelings for their friend. Shane could think that, whatever, but to make it so _obvious_ right in front of Megan made Garrett want to fall flat on his back in a spacious ditch like Spongebob had and cover himself with an even layer of dirt, never to be seen again.

    He feels awkward, watching Andrew and Megan as though they’re monkeys in an exhibit, but he can’t make himself look away either. He needs to see where this goes.

* * *

    He tells Megan the truth out there on the porch. For some insane reason, Andrew feels inclined to be honest with her. She’s so pretty and kind and real, and he doesn’t want to play games. He tells her that he’s got feelings for someone else, and when she asks knowingly if it’s a guy, Andrew can’t find it in himself to lie. She grins a little and says that if it’s anyone here tonight, she can pretty much guarantee that they feel the same. It certainly can’t be either Shane or Ryland.

    He has no idea what to say, but she smoothly tells him to ask her out on a second date for the cameras and it works to satisfy Shane’s incessant good-nature (for now). Andrew even drives Megan home and, like some kind of bisexual fairy godmother, she talks to him about his situation the whole drive there. It occurs to Andrew that he’s never spoken to anyone about what he’s been going through, and that it feels so fucking amazing to finally be sharing it with someone, even if that someone is a lovely YouTuber his friends had attempted to set him up with (despite his having never before interacted with her).

    When he pulls back into Shane’s driveway, it feels like there’s just less gunk in Andrew’s head, and he walks in much lighter than when he’d left. They all notice it, and he can’t hide it. He gives a sort-of-mostly honest recount of the night, and then once the cameras are off for real, he offers to drive Garrett home too. As though reading right into Andrew’s mind, Shane gives him a little squint and imperceptible smile, and Andrew’s heart swells at having such decent people as friends.

* * *

    Garrett doesn’t want to accept the ride. He wants to call for a car because he’s certain Andrew’s offer comes with him gushing sweetly about Megan and her unmistakably feminine curls and her lackluster ability to whip and rap and he just doesn’t really want to hear it at 12 in the morning. He goes anyway, of course, despite his extreme desire not to, and resolves to make it as normal as possible.

    “I’ve been lying to you,” Andrew blurts once they pull into the driveway, and Garrett stops mid-sentence about the new Marvel movie to say, “Okay?”

    “We laugh at the comments about me and Morgan and about me being gay, but—they’re true.”

    Garrett’s eyebrows lift to his hairline. “You’re—in love with Ryland’s younger sister?”

    “No, I—” Andrew shakes his head. “This isn’t coming out right. Literally.” He laughs breathlessly and Garrett is lost.

    His voice takes on the soft quality he reserves for Andrew as he says, “Andrew, just… talk to me, man.”

    “I know. Okay.” Andrew inhales. “I’m not the token straight male friend. I’m bi. Like Shane is bi.”

    “I know Shane is bi,” Garrett says dumbly.

    “I know you know. But I am too, and I wanted you to know that.” Andrew closes his eyes, embarrassed at his lack of eloquence. “I didn’t want to tell you like this, so awkward and fucking weird but tonight, with Megan, I… She sort of implied that you... might feel the same.”

    “I’m definitely not bi,” Garrett says, more confused than ever.

    “No, no, I mean, that you might feel the same about me,” Andrew explains in one breath. “Because I like you. Garrett, I _more_ than like you. Have since we were in Memphis. It’s pathetic, if I’m being real.”

    This is the moment Garrett had wished for since he was 13 and now that it’s here, he’s got absolutely no clue what to say, so he settles on the truth in its simplest form.

    “I love you a lot,” he blurts. “In an _in_   _love_ way, not a friend way. For just as long as you, apparently. And I hated watching you with her tonight. It made me wanna…” He flexes his fingers and then drops them into his lap. “I don’t know, but nothing nice.”

    Andrew laughs a little, a more tired version of that erratic laugh Garrett loves. “I don’t know what to say. Now that I said it I feel dumb for not having done it sooner, you know?”

    “Why… why didn’t you?”

    “Too nervous? I don’t know. Maybe I thought you’d look at me differently if you knew I’ve always looked at _you_ … like that.”

    “How can you possibly be a videographer if you’re so blind?” Garrett demands, mouth open wide in his puppy grin. Andrew tilts his head, unsure what he means. “You’ve recorded me for years and you never saw the way I looked at you?” Garrett laughs at the absurdity. As if he’d been subtle at all.

    “Well, it was easier for me,” Andrew agrees sheepishly. “Being able to hide my face behind the camera.”

    “Not your laugh though,” Garrett says. “Always heard that.”

    “Yeah. It sort of is a dead giveaway, huh?”

    “I like it,” Garrett says. “Even if you had to edit it out for months.”

    “I’m actually really relieved to not have to do that anymore.”

    “And I’m glad you’re a real part of the squad,” Garrett says, and they both laugh a little.

    “So, what do you think?” Andrew asks after a second. “What now?”

    “Well,” Garrett says, thoughtful, “we should probably spend the entire night discussing the details of your time in the closet—”

    “Garrett!”

    Garrett laughs loudly, all his teeth on display, and says, “Hey, as your best friend, and the guy who’s loved you _forever_ , I think I deserve it!” Andrew’s own laugh trails off and Garrett looks at him. “What now? More bombs to drop?”

    “No, just—to hear you say it again. You _love_ me. It’s kinda—”

    “You’re uncomfortable,” Garrett interrupts immediately, wincing. “Sorry. I—”

    “Hey, no,” Andrew says and he grabs onto Garrett’s hand without thinking. “No. I was _going_ to say, before you so rudely cut in, that it’s kinda the best thing ever. My best friend loves me in an 'in love' way.”

    “And mine loves me in a 'in love' way.” Garrett guffaws again, squeezing Andrew’s hand happily, embarrassed. “This is so beyond cheesy, I’m gonna throw up. And I thought being around Shane so much, nothing could faze me anymore.”

    Andrew grins. “Hey, so, although I definitely don’t wanna stay up all night discussing my time in the closet—”

    “Fine,” Garrett pretends to agree in reluctance.

    “I _would_ like to catch _A New Hope_ in your home movie-theatre,” Andrew says, and at Garrett’s dropped jaw, he says quickly, “I was just thinking yesterday how cool it would look up there and if—”

    “You’re my perfect man,” Garrett interjects, already jumping from the car. When Andrew is too stunned to move, he pokes his head back in to tease, “Let’s go, cameraman! We’re running out of daylight!”

    “It’s two in the morning!”

    “Precisely!” Garrett sings, yanking Andrew by the hand to the door of his tiny house. He stops abruptly and turns to face Andrew, then, who he can barely see in the dark. He should’ve kept the lights on when he left for Shane’s and he wishes he could just say _Lumos_ and light up the space but whatever. Not the first time he’s wished for magic and it won’t be the last. He tries to focus on Andrew, who laughs lightly, eyes adjusting to seeing his friend’s face in the dark.

    “What?” he asks, voice lifting to expose he’s feeling nervous and awkward. It’s such a familiar thing and Garrett won’t ever get sick of hearing it.

    Opportunely, he has a sudden flash to when he and Shane first tried to have sex, or really to initiate anything of the sort. Shane had turned to him with The Look in his eyes and Garrett can still remember having a feeling of wrongness, like this is the wrong moment, this isn’t where I’m supposed to be, and he stopped Shane before anything could happen. It hadn’t just been the moment, it had been the person. The red-head he wanted to kiss wasn’t Shane. The man he wanted and still wants is right here. And he wants Garrett right back. It’s ludicrous, but it’s true. He’s been waiting and wasting almost fifteen years and he isn’t about to go fifteen more _seconds_ without—

    “Hey,” he says.

    “Hi,” Andrew replies, a bit of his nervousness going away as he laughs again at Garrett’s weirdness. “What’s up?”

    Instead of answering, Garrett leans down in what is probably the smoothest ‘lean’ he’s ever done or will do for the foreseeable future and settles his mouth against Andrew’s. It’s insane, it’s unasked for. But it’s exactly what Andrew wants, though, right? Because he said that he’s in love with Garrett and is bi and enjoys sexual things with women, but what if he doesn’t enjoy them with men? What if he’s only romantically interested but not—

    But for once Garrett doesn’t allow himself to overthink, and he doesn’t have much of a chance to anyhow because Andrew’s kissing him _back_. His palms are all of a sudden pressed flat to the back of Garrett’s shoulders and he’s pulling Garrett against him like it’s everything and it _is_ , it is everything, because it’s taken way too long and neither of them can forgive themselves for waiting.

    They break apart and Andrew’s forehead is against Garrett’s arm and they’re both breathless and laughing and it’s _everything_.

    “I half expected Benjamin to, like, be watching us from the window,” Andrew murmurs, and Garrett’s jubilant laugh explodes louder than ever; Andrew’s follows right after and the sounds mingle there in the air outside, perfectly wild and loose.

    “Thank _God_ you made me laugh in class,” Andrew says quietly.

    “Thank God I’m an Internet sensation and have always been hilarious,” Garrett replies, and they laugh again. Garrett hopes every day can be exactly like this and his hold on Garrett’s waist tightens. He remembers Prom, can’t believe that Andrew loved him even then. But he can, really, and everything just makes so much sense that it feels like he’s going to explode with it all.

    “Can we go in now?” Andrew asks. “Popcorn and _Star Wars_ sounds pretty good right now.”

    Garrett unlocks the double doors and lets Andrew in first, like a gentleman, arm extended goofishly. “I should’ve known there was a reason you liked the idea of bisexual Han Solo,” he says over Andrew’s snort.

    “Luke and Leia are both hot,” Andrew says, blushing. “And Han’s too messy to be straight.”

    Garrett puts a hand to his chest dramatically. “You really are part of the squad.”

    Andrew laughs and shoves him lightly before putting the popcorn into the microwave, and then leans against the counter to watch Garrett the Friendly Giant set up the movie.

    Like he can feel Andrew’s eyes on him, Garrett glances over his shoulder with a shit-eating grin and a raucous laugh. He loves him. He loves Garrett and Garrett loves him and they’re here, together.

    When Garrett kisses him again not five minutes into the movie, Andrew isn’t sure he’ll ever get used to the feeling, and he doesn’t want to get used to it. He wishes for every time to be like the first, every moment as crazy and unpredictable as the Saturday afternoon they’d first started filming Garrett’s English project.

    And when he falls asleep pretty much full-body on Garrett’s chest, tucked in long arms and popcorn kernels, Andrew thinks that’s a pretty good start.

**Author's Note:**

> we stan tooth decaying fluff sis! eskeetit


End file.
